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The grass may be greener but is it a good choice?

Those of you who have read the page called “About” on here may know that among other things, I also happen to have Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) formerly known as Multiple Personality Disorder.   I recently went through a phase where I pretty much felt sorry for myself and wanted to move elsewhere because the grass looked greener there then it does here.  As someone I bounced the idea of relocating off of pointed out, that something I really don’t want to go into detail about but to put it mildly it was a horrendous and life threatening situatuion that occurred someplace in the area I was considering moving to.  Because of having DID, much of my past is fragmented and often there are huge gaps in what I know about myself and what I don’t have a clue about in regards to my past.  The event that I mentioned above is one of those things that was in one such gap.  If it hadn’t been for one of my other personalities showing me what they had experienced, but had been keeping from me, I would have dove head first into the idea of moving to that location.  You see having DID is much like a alancing act, I have to balance not only my neeeds, but the needs of the other personalities and to be honest everything got out of kilter and I had started to neglect the needs of the other personalities.  So while the grass seemed like it was much greener for a lot of reasons that my sounding board agreed were valid reasons, I decided that looks can be deceiving and just because the grass looks greener doesn’t mean it’s the right choice for me to make.  So, for now I am going to stay put and work on finding ways to improve my situation without moving to the place I had thought would be idea but in reality may not be.

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